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WHAT IS A WEED?
By Peter D. Goldfinch
Recently, while thrashing
through the underbrush in the most remote reaches of Pine Brook, the thought
occurred to me, ''What is a Weed?'' An archaic meaning which I have always
liked is ''wild, luxuriant undergrowth." When this humble individual was
still small, the weeds were a secret uncivilized place to be where one often
found lost or hidden things. Mother would demand "Where have you been?" or
''Where did you find that? '' The answer ''out in the weeds'' never
completely satisfied her but what could she do?
Then we have Weed as ''A
herbaceous plant not valued for use or beauty, growing wild and rank and
regarded as cumbering the ground or hindering the growth of superior
vegetation," rather nicely worded in the OED, as is ''An unprofitable,
troublesome, noxious growth. (Formerly often applied to persons)." In the
latter sense is Cowper, 1781 : "But grace abuse'd brings forth the foulest
deeds, as richest soil the most luxuriant weeds." This, for some reason,
brings Washington D.C. to mind.
On my bed stand is ''Weeds
of the West.'' published by the Western Society of Weed Science. Its authors
rather technocratically define a weed as ''A plant that interferes with
management objectives for a given area of land at a given point in time." At
least this version leaves open the possibility of salvation for a designated
weed at some later point in time when no longer interfering with management
objectives as, for example, dandelion greens from one's lawn becoming a fine
salad. Ralph "Weedo" Emerson said. '' A weed is a herb whose virtue has not
yet been discovered." Reading ''Weeds of the West'' at bedtime I love to
savor the flavor of weed names such as Nodding Beggarticks, Bristly
Hawksbeard, Blue Lettuce, Nipplewort, London Rocket, Blessed Milkthistle,
Poverty Sumpweed and scores of others that I can hardly resist mentioning.
Some do appreciate weeds.
Goldfinches love thistle seed and will often have a fine meal while perched
upon a bobbing thistle head. They often line their nests with thistledown.
In fact, the goldfinch nest is so well constructed that it will hold water
for several hours - a kind of private swimming pool.
One can hardly help admiring
weeds. They cast their seed upon the ground without fear of Biblical
injunction. No one tills and fertilizes the soil for them. No social worker
comes around to assess the needs of weeds. If a baby weed in the form of a
seed lands on a rock and tries to sprout there. . well tough.
And, of course, for those
weeds fortunate and enterprising enough to reach maturity, it may be
necessary to face the scourge of the human species: being hacked or burned
to death, poisoned with toxic chemicals.
Survival is difficult. Was
it P. D. Goldfinch who said ''I think that I shall never heed a plant so
hardy as a weed?"
At the current rapid rate of
scientific progress Homo Sap. may soon possess biological weapons in the
form of neurotoxic gasses or microorganisms like Anthrax, Smallpox, Ebola,
etc. genetically altered for biological warfare that could eradicate the
entire human species. In such an eventuality, we might inquire "And what
would happen to weeds?" The answer is that weeds would no longer exist
because with humans gone language would be gone and with it the linguistic
construct "weed.'' What had formerly been designated as weeds interfering
with human management objectives would just be ordinary herbaceous plants
and live happily ever after.
from The Pine Brook Press |
